Lately, things are a bit hostile in the forum!

[Reef Pilot]

Originally Posted by The Grizz

Then there is the fact that everyone has there own opinion whether right or wrong but the hostility is just the way this world seems to be going.

I think there is a lot to this, although it is not necessarily bad. When I was a kid (and grew up in a small town), if you questioned "authority" (or experience), you were considered disrespectful.

I think that has now changed, and the internet has had a lot to do with it. Kids growing up are a lot more informed, and encouraged to question and seek new knowledge. And with social networking, your sphere of friends and influence has greatly increased.

That has led to more communication, but less face to face, and with twitter, texting, et al, shorter snippets that are more to the point, and less on the tact side.

Personally, I think this is good. When you are online, you leave a record of what you say, and that forces some accountability. You can't get away with BS and maintain credibility.

Unfortunately (but maybe entertaining), one of the consequences is more "online drama". People are quicker to take exception, and shoot back online. In person, those same people would be a lot more reserved in what they say.

Anyway, that is just the way it is, so I guess we just need to accept and adapt...

[Proteus]

We have all experienced this issue. But while I may have come off harsh myself it not the case. Text has no emotion. We take the post depending on our mood and depending in the subject.

There are a few on here that are very passionate about what they say and while they may be blunt with certin threads like tangs they may also be very generous with help toward new members but still blunt. Thanks to the Internet everyone is a 300lb bad guy who is going to tell you how it is.

Myself I don't have alot of friends due to work and family so I consider this forum as my group. Lol. Yeah I know. " loser".
But being said that I try not to be mean or harsh and would expect a MSG back if some one felt such

[Dearth]

This is a tame forum compared to some I've been and post on regularly...wanna see hostile try posting this on a site like RC or Nano Reef then get out Kiens popcorn get an armchair and watch the ensuing fun and fireworks we are definitely more reserved than our neighbours to the south.

[Coralgurl]

Originally Posted by Dearth

This is a tame forum compared to some I've been and post on regularly...wanna see hostile try posting this on a site like RC or Nano Reef then get out Kiens popcorn get an armchair and watch the ensuing fun and fireworks we are definitely more reserved than our neighbours to the south.

This is sooo true. I'm on another forum not reef related and it blows my mind what some people think is appropriate to post. We are truly Canadian on this site and for the most part, a very friendly bunch

[Reef Pilot]

Originally Posted by Coralgurl

This is sooo true. I'm on another forum not reef related and it blows my mind what some people think is appropriate to post. We are truly Canadian on this site and for the most part, a very friendly bunch

Very true indeed. I have some American friends, and some have noticed and even admitted to me that Canadians are more friendly and tolerant.

Maybe it has something to do with the unhappiness that comes with their failing image of being the world's greatest...

[daplatapus]

Not to make this any more controversial, but I refuse to believe or live my life by the creed of "The world is what it is and we have to lower our standards and join it. There's nothing we can do about it."
We all have choices in what we say and how we say it. Some people are truly double faced. One persona in person, but because they hide behind some alias on a forum, a totally different person on line because they feel they can get away with it. The more that spirit is adopted as the norm and is ok, the lower these forums will sink into tirades, name calling and un-fettered venting of emotions.
Keep in mind this a hobby. My view of a forum like this is to share our experience, meet with like minded people who share a common interest (because my wife sure doesn't share it, lol), give help and get it when needed. But there's huge differences in experience, temperaments, and code of conduct between all our members. And that's Ok. But I think we still have to have standards and hold to account those who don't respect that.
And guess what, if someone has a differing opinion than I, no amount of disrespect and name calling is going to change my mind. A well written post, with the intent of HELPING me might.

It all comes down to choices. We're either part of the problem or part of the solution. We can all choose to be tactful, helpful and kind and enjoy ourselves here, or do the reverse and feel uncomfortable posting our mistakes or experiences because we know we're going to get lambasted.

[jorjef]

Sticks and stones. The only person that can make you feel bad, inferior and etc. etc. ....... is yourself. Believe it and be stronger because of it.

[Nano]

Originally Posted by daplatapus

Not to make this any more controversial, but I refuse to believe or live my life by the creed of "The world is what it is and we have to lower our standards and join it. There's nothing we can do about it."
We all have choices in what we say and how we say it. Some people are truly double faced. One persona in person, but because they hide behind some alias on a forum, a totally different person on line because they feel they can get away with it. The more that spirit is adopted as the norm and is ok, the lower these forums will sink into tirades, name calling and un-fettered venting of emotions.
Keep in mind this a hobby. My view of a forum like this is to share our experience, meet with like minded people who share a common interest (because my wife sure doesn't share it, lol), give help and get it when needed. But there's huge differences in experience, temperaments, and code of conduct between all our members. And that's Ok. But I think we still have to have standards and hold to account those who don't respect that.
And guess what, if someone has a differing opinion than I, no amount of disrespect and name calling is going to change my mind. A well written post, with the intent of HELPING me might.

It all comes down to choices. We're either part of the problem or part of the solution. We can all choose to be tactful, helpful and kind and enjoy ourselves here, or do the reverse and feel uncomfortable posting our mistakes or experiences because we know we're going to get lambasted.

Amen to that. Well said.

[SeaHorse_Fanatic]

Originally Posted by daplatapus

Not to make this any more controversial, but I refuse to believe or live my life by the creed of "The world is what it is and we have to lower our standards and join it. There's nothing we can do about it."
We all have choices in what we say and how we say it. Some people are truly double faced. One persona in person, but because they hide behind some alias on a forum, a totally different person on line because they feel they can get away with it. The more that spirit is adopted as the norm and is ok, the lower these forums will sink into tirades, name calling and un-fettered venting of emotions.
Keep in mind this a hobby. My view of a forum like this is to share our experience, meet with like minded people who share a common interest (because my wife sure doesn't share it, lol), give help and get it when needed. But there's huge differences in experience, temperaments, and code of conduct between all our members. And that's Ok. But I think we still have to have standards and hold to account those who don't respect that.
And guess what, if someone has a differing opinion than I, no amount of disrespect and name calling is going to change my mind. A well written post, with the intent of HELPING me might.

It all comes down to choices. We're either part of the problem or part of the solution. We can all choose to be tactful, helpful and kind and enjoy ourselves here, or do the reverse and feel uncomfortable posting our mistakes or experiences because we know we're going to get lambasted.

I totally agree with this sentiment.

I am far more diplomatic online, especially on Canreef & BCA, than I sometimes an in person because I know what I write and post leaves a record of who I am and what I stand for. I do not try to hide behind the "anonymity" of the internet maybe because I know or have met most of the local reefers and aquarists (or at least it seems that way). I think it is not that hard for each of us to re-read and think about what we have typed before hitting the "Submit Reply" button. In person, we might react out of shock, but online, we can pause and think "do I really want others to read this post?"

At the same time, I understand that there are some individuals who drive each of us a little crazy and what they write, will be taken negatively and likely to elicit a negative response. Some of the negative posts may be due to immaturity or someone having a bad day, as others have mentioned. Unfortunately, we cannot edit our own posts after 15 minutes or so, and whatever was posted while we were in a bad mood becomes permanently posted for everyone to see (unless the staff deletes it).

Just my $.02.

Anthony