Random Thought Thread

[jorjef]

Originally Posted by intarsiabox

Like a very stern talking to? They are hooligans because there are no consequences anymore. If the cops brought me home when I was a kid I'd get a lick'en, now the parents would be in jail if they took the kids xbox away. The young offenders act gives them anonymity and sealed records. I know teens who were convicted of drug trafficing and robbery and got a few hours of community work and a curfew for a few months (unless they had to work to buy more games so they wouldn't get bored during curfew). They then turned 18 and and that was the end of it.

Some truth, but at the start of it all is the parents or more accurately lack of. I remember a time when my 14 year old (at the time) threatened to call child services, I can't remember the reason but I had probably cuffed him one up side the head. I turned to him and tossed him the phone and said ' enjoy your new the foster home' Needless to say no call was made.

The art of instilling the healthy fear of punishment and a high expectation of respect to parents has been lost in today's parenting and parents can only blame themselves. If started at a young age and CONTINUED' as kids grow older alot of today's issues of kids and a total lack of respect for anything other themselves could be avoided.

I hate time outs, a swift two smacks to a bare butt gets alot more results....Oh ya and bring back the strap to schools.

[Coralgurl]

So anyone got some suggestions on how to deal with this hooligan? He's a good kid making bad decisions. He has been bullied for years, the schools and their anti bullying campaign is a joke. He's popular, smart (has improved his grades big time this year) but hes short. And has 3 good parents (I'm his step mom). He's respectful at home, does his chores, and participates in the family. I've never been the parent who's child does no wrong, or fought their battles. This is hard but his choices last night have landed him in big trouble and I hope the system is tough on him. He has consequences at home.

[gregzz4]

Couldn't agree more joref
A little strapping or back-handing goes a long way

And about calling Child Services ...
I remember Russell Peters' skit ...
Here's a piece of it

LANGUAGE WARNING - profanity and such

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzKHQX59Wso

My favorite part is when he talks about his Dad saying it will take Children's Aid 23 minutes to get there

[gregzz4]

Originally Posted by Coralgurl

So anyone got some suggestions on how to deal with this hooligan? He's a good kid making bad decisions. He has been bullied for years, the schools and their anti bullying campaign is a joke. He's popular, smart (has improved his grades big time this year) but hes short. And has 3 good parents (I'm his step mom). He's respectful at home, does his chores, and participates in the family. I've never been the parent who's child does no wrong, or fought their battles. This is hard but his choices last night have landed him in big trouble and I hope the system is tough on him. He has consequences at home.

Without details, it's kinda hard to give any input

I grew up with 4 parents, so I had lots of different input

Oh, and by the way ...
Although I come from a back-hand kind of upbringing, we don't have kids, so some may say I have no right to give input

[gregzz4]

I'm going to get slapped by the posting police for adding another one ......

I thought I would try to satisfy my sweet tooth today and buy up some leftover halloween stuff from the big box stores ....

Not much to buy as they have all switched over to X-mas stuff already

Jeez, what is going on with our society ???
Nov 1st and the stores are covered in X-mas stuff !!!!
Every year it's the same ...

Halloween isn't even over yet and they're throwing the adds out there

Can't even get past the end of October and there are already X-mas adds on TV

I am so tired of consumerism

There has to be a new rule for retailers and media ....

No X-mas stuff until after Nov 15, or better yet, until Dec 1st

[SeaHorse_Fanatic]

Shopper's Drug Mart at Willingdon & Kingsway - 100 pack of Twix, Snickers, M&Ms and Mars bars for just over $8. Worked out to about $10 including HST.

[gregzz4]

Originally Posted by SeaHorse_Fanatic

Shopper's Drug Mart at Willingdon & Kingsway - 100 pack of Twix, Snickers, M&Ms and Mars bars for just over $8. Worked out to about $10 including HST.

Dam you !!!!
I didn't want to buy any more chocolates
Now I'll have to go shopping

[jorjef]

Originally Posted by Coralgurl

So anyone got some suggestions on how to deal with this hooligan? He's a good kid making bad decisions. He has been bullied for years, the schools and their anti bullying campaign is a joke. He's popular, smart (has improved his grades big time this year) but hes short. And has 3 good parents (I'm his step mom). He's respectful at home, does his chores, and participates in the family. I've never been the parent who's child does no wrong, or fought their battles. This is hard but his choices last night have landed him in big trouble and I hope the system is tough on him. He has consequences at home.

Sounds like one bad decision, and if that's all it is hopefully the discipline dished out will realign his thinking. If you and your other don't feel it's enough take away the most important thing he has, a car, video games, sports etc. It doesn't need to be forever but make it sting. I always drive home big time and I mean big time reversing the situation, put him in the victims shoes and talk about how this has effected the victim. Starting in a normal talking tone, escalating volume and intensity, if they are arguing back. You need to drive the point home and ultimately if he refuses to understand smash something of his right in front of him. He will soon understand as a final insult make him clean it up. This sounds like it may border on mental cruelty but if you guys are loving and supportive parents the other 99 percent of the time it will be a good reminder for him if he decides to make another bad decision anytime soon.

Now if there was any doubt in anyone's mind before this I'm sure it will confirm to them that yes I am a little nuts

[Coralgurl]

Originally Posted by jorjef

Sounds like one bad decision, and if that's all it is hopefully the discipline dished out will realign his thinking. If you and your other don't feel it's enough take away the most important thing he has, a car, video games, sports etc. It doesn't need to be forever but make it sting. I always drive home big time and I mean big time reversing the situation, put him in the victims shoes and talk about how this has effected the victim. Starting in a normal talking tone, escalating volume and intensity, if they are arguing back. You need to drive the point home and ultimately if he refuses to understand smash something of his right in front of him. He will soon understand as a final insult make him clean it up. This sounds like it may border on mental cruelty but if you guys are loving and supportive parents the other 99 percent of the time it will be a good reminder for him if he decides to make another bad decision anytime soon.

Now if there was any doubt in anyone's mind before this I'm sure it will confirm to them that yes I am a little nuts

We all will be sitting down this weekend to discuss with him this situation. Yesterday was not the time to do it as we basically pulled an all nighter, we're tired and grumpy. At this point he has lost his most important things and won't be getting them back anytime soon. I suggested an apology to the victim, which his dad agrees should be done, but he's been ordered to not have any contact until the court date in December.

He has already acknowledged being where he was and the others involved always leads to trouble and he's not going to hang out there anymore. His mom is looking into youth counseling programs to get him some help with his self esteem issues. Remarkably, he received a progress report from school yesterday and has pulled his marks from mid 70s to mid 80s in the last month.

Is this the first time he's gotten into trouble? No. He averages 3 suspensions a year from school for fighting. 2 years ago he got caught tagging a transformer, this was a bylaw offense so he was issued a fine and court date, community service was the punishment, plus we implemented punishment at home.

Believe me, I have had my say about what I think should be happening over the years. Hopefully there's some changes. If I didn't care and wasn't supportive, I wouldn't be asking for advice.

[Coralgurl]

Originally Posted by gregzz4

Dam you !!!!
I didn't want to buy any more chocolates
Now I'll have to go shopping

Go shopping!! Best day for leftover candy is the 31st, always half price to clear. I've seen christmasx stuff in stores since the end of September