Do you ask yourself, "What is the worst that can happen?"

[Delphinus]

I ask myself this question a lot. And yet, still, not nearly often enough.

So. Let me tell you about my lunch today.

It's cold outside today. The kind of day where you wear a coat to go outside, no matter what.

A bunch of us left for Wednesday lunch at our favourite restaurant.

At the restaurant, there were two tables full of Calgary's finest (I think one of them might have been retiring, or something, it was a big to-do, there were 16 people at two tables).

Anyhow, because this particular restaurant had been involved in an incident, there's a table underneath the coat rack where there are lots of flowers. LOTS. Of. Flowers. Anyhow, whatever. So, not wanting to knock over the flowers, all the coats were on one side of this shelving rack.

I hung up my coat. I reach over to grab my friends coat so to offer to hang it up for him, and with my other hand, I reach over to the coats already hung up and move them over just 1" so that our coats will fit and not knock over the flowers. Because that would be embarrassing, especially with so many police officers next to the table with the flowers.

Well.

Their coats were heavy.

Sliding them over 1" was too much for the shelving unit to bear, and pop! Out of the wall it came crashing down. Quickly thinking I reach up and catch the shelf and the coats. Now my hands are completely full, there's a shelf falling out of the wall, and I'm basically grappling about 6 police officer's coats. One of their policeman's hats was on the shelf and fell to the floor.

So, now they get up to come get their coats, they say it's OK, etc. etc. I notice that one of their coats is covered in plaster dust. I offer to brush it off, he declines, says it's OK, no don't worry about it. One of the girls at the table says "And it's OK, he's only the deputy chief."

Anyhow, after the long socially awkward moment finally ends, we all sit down, go back to lunch, etc.

Now comes the time the police are done their lunch. The deputy chief stands up, and is looking around. Finally comes up and asks "Have you seen my hat?... a fur hat."

We look under our table.

Guess what. There sits a fur hat with a police sheild under our feet..

Reach down, grab it, .... brush off the footprint, and hand it back. To the deputy chief of police.

Somehow, "um, sorry?" just doesn't seem adequate at this moment in time ...

So ... I'll just move these coats over 1". Because knocking over the flowers would be EMBARASSING. "What's the worst that can happen???"


<sigh>