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Originally Posted by Namscam
but u cant control where to put the anemone, they move to where they desire
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FWIW, that's not entirely accurate. It's up to us to create a spot for the anemone that it wants to be in. Ritteri's have a reputation for being the worst wanderers, but it's because unsuspecting aquarists rarely put them in a spot that they like. If you look at where you'll find a ritteri on a real reef, you'll notice a few clues as to what they need. For one, they're at the top of the reef. They can even found above the low tide line in shallow water. That puts them as close as they can be to the sunlight, and it puts them right into the surge zone.
To be honest, if your tank is only three months old, it is no place for a ritteri. I'm sorry but that's my opinion.
I don't want to sound like I'm picking on you too, but, .... now you're talking about a lionfish. You're all over the map here, going from one extreme to another. My advice to you is, figure out first what exactly you really want to do. Try to imagine where you want your tank to be, two years from now. That might help you distill down what your next few steps will be. Before committing to purchases, look for examples of what you would like to try. We all do it -- we look at other examples, and then we try to emulate those examples. I see things that work, and I take away something from that. I see things that don't work, and I take away something from that, too. Read, read, read, and read some more.
I'm very sorry for your losses. Failure is a hard pill to swallow, but, try to take a good hard honest look at what happened and see what you can take away from this. What can you do differently from now on? We all do this too. If something doesn't work out the way we'd hoped, we ask ourselves, "whereupon did I go wrong in all of this?" Whether it's just because you were unlucky, or whether you were flirting with disaster from the get-go, you can always seize it as an opportunity to change something so that the risk is minimized for the same thing from happening again in the future.