Thanks all. I had sort of opened this thread in the hopes that I'd find an actual professional service that would perform this as an invoiceable service just to see what/who was out there but I guess it looks like there is no such thing.
Turns out globaldesigns and I live pretty close to each other so we'll come up with a gentlemen's agreement over this.
@Abcha0s- I'm not sure if I'm around that time otherwise I'd offer up but I can certainly be a backup contact if need be, just would maybe need a quick once-over of the system before you go so I'd know what to do in the event of an issue.