Lately, things are a bit hostile in the forum!
 

Well I couldn't help noticing that I am seeing a lot of hostility among hobbyist regarding many reasons, most noticeable being issues related to "prices".

Is it only me or has anyone else noticed that? :razz:

Is it something "seasonal"? Or just a new uprising? Sometimes, I am even scared to post in this forum now-a-days and always think like 100 times before posting any sort of price.

well if you don't want to post then don't post. Really if you are scared for someone posting here don't go on the board.

This is what I was talking about :wink:

If you are referring to my thread on pricing, it was started out of curiosity, not to bash anyone's pricing. I've read every post and each point made is a good one. There's no hostility there.

I love finding good deals here as does everyone else. I haven't taken offense to anyone's post as I don't think any was intended.

Oh no no nooooooo. I am sorry if I have sent out the wrong sign :(

I meant about some of the bashing that has been happening recently about "high prices" and things similar to that. By no mean I referred to your post. Really sorry if my post came out wrong :(

Everybody has there own idea of what things are worth, some of us that have been in the hobby for a while usuall ask half of what items are worth new. Then there is the fact that everyone has there own opinion weither right or wrong but the hostility is just the way this world seems to be going.

I hear ya raied I was recently told via pm that I have no business being here cause I don't currently have a tank. Among other "nice" things. The way I look at it is if you don't feed into it people just quit. Theyre desperate for any interaction be it positive or negative. I just try to ignore it. I may banter back once or twice but then I think are they worth it? No they aren't.

I blame video games :razz::wink:

Hmmmmmmmm really please explain

Reporting such things to staff might be a good idea. Then staff can get hostile too :)

Yah....hostility everywhere :(

Ops that sucks :neutral:

I try to resist from posting in controversial posts but sometimes, my posts itself becomes controversial :razz:

That's a positive! I miss mario days!

Yeah but banned people don't stay banned so I'm not concerned about it

Hasan-man, it is seasonal. If I was a better coder I'd be able to root thought the archives to show the "temperature" of the forum with time. It does seem things tend to boil over certain times of the year. Maybe the changing weather has people's panties in a bunch?

I think this is also an Internet effect. It's much easier to be a total dink from behind the anonymity of a keyboard. Had a ****ty day? Really easy to vent online at someone, give it a try! Seriously, it's a lot easier to talk **** at someone when you're not looking them in the eyes, you don't have that same mental filter that says "Hey, maybe I shouldn't say this" or "Hmmm, this might sound harsh". Unfortunately this is pretty common on the Internet, and our beloved forum is no different.

Debate is fine, and even encouraged - that's how we can root out some interesting discussions that can further the hobby. Unfortunately there are a few that drag it down to petty name calling because they think their thoughts are the only way, or they are misinformed and battle to the end over information they didn't stop to question, or have some weird need to always be right... The list goes on. The fact that people send out threatening PMs (and I've got them before too) is pretty sad.

We're lucky that we don't have a totalitarian forum like some other Reef Centered sites out there but there are certainly a few members around here that make that system a valid argument.

Interesting vid, but this is 'saltwater'.... well, for the most part anyhow...

I think there is a lot to this, although it is not necessarily bad. When I was a kid (and grew up in a small town), if you questioned "authority" (or experience), you were considered disrespectful.

I think that has now changed, and the internet has had a lot to do with it. Kids growing up are a lot more informed, and encouraged to question and seek new knowledge. And with social networking, your sphere of friends and influence has greatly increased.

That has led to more communication, but less face to face, and with twitter, texting, et al, shorter snippets that are more to the point, and less on the tact side.

Personally, I think this is good. When you are online, you leave a record of what you say, and that forces some accountability. You can't get away with BS and maintain credibility.

Unfortunately (but maybe entertaining), one of the consequences is more "online drama". People are quicker to take exception, and shoot back online. In person, those same people would be a lot more reserved in what they say.

Anyway, that is just the way it is, so I guess we just need to accept and adapt...

We have all experienced this issue. But while I may have come off harsh myself it not the case. Text has no emotion. We take the post depending on our mood and depending in the subject.

There are a few on here that are very passionate about what they say and while they may be blunt with certin threads like tangs they may also be very generous with help toward new members but still blunt. Thanks to the Internet everyone is a 300lb bad guy who is going to tell you how it is.

Myself I don't have alot of friends due to work and family so I consider this forum as my group. Lol. Yeah I know. " loser". ;)
But being said that I try not to be mean or harsh and would expect a MSG back if some one felt such

This is a tame forum compared to some I've been and post on regularly...wanna see hostile try posting this on a site like RC or Nano Reef then get out Kiens popcorn get an armchair and watch the ensuing fun and fireworks we are definitely more reserved than our neighbours to the south.

This is sooo true. I'm on another forum not reef related and it blows my mind what some people think is appropriate to post. We are truly Canadian on this site and for the most part, a very friendly bunch :lol:

Very true indeed. I have some American friends, and some have noticed and even admitted to me that Canadians are more friendly and tolerant.

Maybe it has something to do with the unhappiness that comes with their failing image of being the world's greatest...

Not to make this any more controversial, but I refuse to believe or live my life by the creed of "The world is what it is and we have to lower our standards and join it. There's nothing we can do about it."
We all have choices in what we say and how we say it. Some people are truly double faced. One persona in person, but because they hide behind some alias on a forum, a totally different person on line because they feel they can get away with it. The more that spirit is adopted as the norm and is ok, the lower these forums will sink into tirades, name calling and un-fettered venting of emotions.
Keep in mind this a hobby. My view of a forum like this is to share our experience, meet with like minded people who share a common interest (because my wife sure doesn't share it, lol), give help and get it when needed. But there's huge differences in experience, temperaments, and code of conduct between all our members. And that's Ok. But I think we still have to have standards and hold to account those who don't respect that.
And guess what, if someone has a differing opinion than I, no amount of disrespect and name calling is going to change my mind. A well written post, with the intent of HELPING me might.

It all comes down to choices. We're either part of the problem or part of the solution. We can all choose to be tactful, helpful and kind and enjoy ourselves here, or do the reverse and feel uncomfortable posting our mistakes or experiences because we know we're going to get lambasted.

Sticks and stones. The only person that can make you feel bad, inferior and etc. etc. ....... is yourself. Believe it and be stronger because of it.

Amen to that. Well said.

It's hostile? Here I thought it was just normal CanReef bickering for the last 9 years... :agrue:

It is mindy some people take it to heart I guess never pass a dig lol

As the bio pellets turn ......so does the the Days Of Our Lives Tee hee

I have noticed that trend as well,but like others have said,canreef represents the population at large. There are a lot a great people that try to help others when they're stressed over tank issues,but there seems to be a minority 'looking for confrontation.' It sounds cliche but there is good and bad everywhere you go so just try to ignore jerks and appreciate the decent people.

I guess so! I think there is often lots lost in translation too. I've many times posted something and gone back to see what the OP responded to have someone throwing a fit and me scratching my head. :neutral:

Heh, we's all human & mess up from time to time. I've put up some silly posts too, ones that I read later & wonder what the H I was thinking. I tend to not sugar coat things & sometimes that comes across the wrong way. Try to provide info from personal experience with the tank, including failures, so there's no point in beating around the bush with certain matters.

I look at it this way. One of the things I'm really into is skiing. I've taken both instructors courses & a race coach course. As an instructor you're working with a client to provide a positive learning experience, so you tend to be nice & attentive to their needs in addition to improving their skill at a fun sport. You may want them to return for another lesson to keep the $$$s rolling into the snowsport school, so tact is key. As a coach all you're looking for is results, go faster. There's no being nice, if the athlete doesn't get it, you tell them straight up where & how they're screwing up & what they need to do to fix it. They either make the grade or move on to another sport. I failed the skiing part or the coaches course since I had never raced. I wasn't going to learn the technique in 3 days, but it was still money well spent. I learned a lot about technique that was not included in the ski instructors courses I'd had.

As far as sales & pricing on a forum go, there have been many posts I've looked at & been tempted to reply that the price might be a bit optimistic, but so far I've been able to resist! Some folks want money for a ball of Chaeto, others give it away free. The seller is not always aware of the current 'market' price for stuff, so I simply let it be. No sense cluttering up the persons for sale post with my 2 cents, they'll figure it out eventually if the item doesn't sell. I've put a couple of items up recently that I consider rock bottom pricing, but no sale. On the other hand, the price police provides a free bump for the sellers thread....

:pop2:

I totally agree with this sentiment.

I am far more diplomatic online, especially on Canreef & BCA, than I sometimes an in person because I know what I write and post leaves a record of who I am and what I stand for. I do not try to hide behind the "anonymity" of the internet maybe because I know or have met most of the local reefers and aquarists (or at least it seems that way). I think it is not that hard for each of us to re-read and think about what we have typed before hitting the "Submit Reply" button. In person, we might react out of shock, but online, we can pause and think "do I really want others to read this post?"

At the same time, I understand that there are some individuals who drive each of us a little crazy and what they write, will be taken negatively and likely to elicit a negative response. Some of the negative posts may be due to immaturity or someone having a bad day, as others have mentioned. Unfortunately, we cannot edit our own posts after 15 minutes or so, and whatever was posted while we were in a bad mood becomes permanently posted for everyone to see (unless the staff deletes it).

Just my $.02.

Anthony

I think some posters here should go back and have a read at some previous threads they've contributed to.

What constitutes animosity is different for each individual, for some, they are comfortable arguing and can handle a passionate, opinionated conversation...both ways, giving and receiving comments adverse to the others in any given thread.

For others, they feel even disagreeing with them is inflammatory, forget about forming a solid example based argument to refute their position on something.

Where I see the biggest loss for this forum is with those members who have a sense of entitlement due to their post count or familiarity withy the regulars on here.

So many newbs and occasional posters get razzed or outright disrespected for asking questions on issues that come up often and repeatedly in the hobby when starting out.

Even some more experienced board members aren't spared the wrath of these uppity reefers should they ask something considered redundant or a simple google search away from getting an answer.

Often, those who do act this way don't even realize it as they are so comfortable on their high horse they don't realize it's a minority who are riding them.

It sometimes just seems like a majority as they seem to back each other up for the most part, no matter how innocent the original posters intentions may have been.

This is why we really have the same people on this forum and most newbs don't stay around long.

I am posting knowing i have contributed to this issue in the past before i realized the prevailant modus operandi I was parroting and really just stopped posting for the most part.

+100

I've been surfing the net for 18 yrs now ever since windows 3.1 and the x86 days and and many things have changed especially in tech but one thing has remained constant throughout the years and that is the forums. I've owned forums, been moderator, been involved in controversy and shared in people's lives and their joy and pain.

One of the largest forums I have ever been on has been WoW(world of warcraft) and you wanna see drama, name calling, downright A$$holes, know it alls, people with superiority complex, whiners and anything else under the sun you will find it there. If you post you will be guaranteed to get every response under the sun there.

This actually holds true for every serious forum out there and one thing I have learned throughout the yrs is that many people lurk rather than post for many of the same reasons already posted on this thread. I have developed a thick skin throughout the yrs of people criticizing my posts and thread starters.

I encourage people to always post don't take negativity to heart some people will always have the superiority complex, will be a$$es and in general be idiots. Lurking is fine but you also have to be aware that if you post be prepared for any type of reply don't take it to heart otherwise you will feel like your being persecuted and that only makes you feel worse for posting please don't take it to heart I can't stress that enough.

:mrgreen:I was looking for a post from someone whom has been here for a while. LOL! CanReef will "always" and forever have controversy. That's what makes us keep coming back! Hey! if we all thought the same way and went in the same direction the fricken leader would jump off the bridge and all of us lemmings would be right behind.

The only common sense thing I can add to any of this is "please be kind to one another".

Hi Myka!