I think we should step back a bit
 

Now before i start this i want to state this really clear, i am not starting this thread to attack, annoy or start an argument. i am just stating an opinion.

its my opinion that lately we have become really aggressive on here. it seems like every 3 or 4th thread a war has begun and then it gets closed. i'm not sure why really. when i first started out this forum it got me to where i am today. you guys helped me out a ton whether you answered direct questions of mine or i was 'lurking' on your amazing tank journals and sucking up what ever info i could. but lately, in my opinion, it has become a buy & sell forum and a place to 'flash our keyboard muscle' at each other. having a difference in opinion is really good, as long as both parties respect each other and listen to the other. i actually prefer threads that the really experienced guys and new guys get on and debate back and forth on ideas and methods but i'm getting tired of following threads that when a difference in opinion is brought up, people attack each other.

maybe i'm out to lunch on this. i dont mean to sound like a sappy tree hugger but i would like to see this board go back to an easy going informative and fun website to go to. let me know what you think. is it just me feeling this way or do you feel the same way?

sorry for the rant, i guess it was my turn to vent tonight............

I haven't noticed it much...but maybe because I spend time on RC, too, and the atmosphere on there is often toxic.

There are always ways to say things civilly and to disagree politely, though. Rudeness and arrogance is never acceptable.

Okay, now that I think about it...yeah. There's a bit of a sense of "chronological snobbery" that weaves throughout the world of aquaria. The longer you've been on, the older you are...yada yada yada. Condescending attitudes toward young people is pretty low in my books.

Ok, I'm done my mini rant too :)

So,what's wrong with sappy tree huggers ?

Fight! Fight! Fight!

Oh..I mean..uhh....*hugs tree*

You are right. I am somewhat guilty. If someone says something on here that is a little over the top eg: not wanting people to post non-related reef stuff in the lounge section, well it bothers me and yes I feel the need to respond. I don't call others names but I can be sort of sarcastic but I try not to be outrightly rude. However I can see how it could offend others. If I have been overly offensive I apologize, I wasn't trying to be rude.

Well said Colin. Its unfortunate but like most public internet boards with a broad spectrum of members, these things happen at times. I agree its sad that an aquarium forum is used to vent ones feeling on other subjects. Keeps the staff busy, thats for sure.

Well, they're all covered in sap for one thing...

Colin,

Most of us are passionate about the hobby, its hard to not let that reflect in our replies or conversations to one another.

But, I agree , Step away from the keyboard !....go clean your skimmers you slackers ! :lol:

But during the years ive watched countless spats, more often longwinded debates where each tries to prove a point.....problem is, theres a point where noone learns from it anymore, and it becomes really about getting the last word or at the very least not step down in front of his peers.

I think something that we all should learn to do in our replies, is just before we hit the "submit" button.....ask yourself, will i or anyone else learn anything out of this reply ?

So beside the submit button....there should also be a reality check button.

I should say this is mostly on the big boards, but is also here, and it also excludes me because i wear a cape. :p

Hey, did you ever wonder who`s truly on display ? , our fish or us ?

I bet my fish say..."what the hell did he go and make for us now"..." "k, guys....when you see his head pop up over the back, just pretend your just want some food, and then lets all pull him in and drown the fool ! "

Now, if you all want the last word, become a Mod....they always truly have the last say...thread closed !

Marc.

Yes, but you also wear your mom's leotards.. :eek: :surprise:

and your undies on the outside :eek::razz:

Hey....

errrr


Thread Closed ?

Hey Marc,

I found a pic of you delivering a livestock order when HR had the free shipping promo. :lol:

http://www.kunsthaus.org.mx/Dulce/superman.jpg

not until we finish discussing your, uh, super costume....:)

:rofl:

Good thing its early so nobody could hear the bark of laughter I just let out! :razz:

the undies on the outside wouldnts be so bad if he didnt wear his leopard g string....... not nice looking :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol: LMAO!!!!!

So now we just make fun of Fudge at his expense, is this any better. :mrgreen:

Yes :D

niloc16 joined mar 06 post count 826

Der Iron Cheif joined oct 06 post count 1,383

sebae joined jan 07 post count 43

fishoholic joined may 07 post count 154

doug joined aug 01 post count 3,069 (staff)

reef raf joined aug 01 post count 7,673 (staff)

super fudge joined aug 01 post count 1,024

muck joined mar 04 post count 4,351 (staff)

christy5 joined aug 01 post count 5,231 (staff)

joe reefer joined jan 05 post count 961

ok so lets see here out of the 11 ppl posting here myself included (at the time i typed this)

4 ppl joined in 01 (my guess at the inception of this site)
1 person joined in 04
1 from 05
2 from 06
2 from 07
and myself (cant remember when i joined)

7 ppl have a post count near 1,000 or way over ( the lowest being 826 and highest being 7,673)

4 ppl are staffmembers of this site

and only 3 of us with considerably lower post counts

lets hear from the ppl that this post was directed at.........
times change this site is not going to be the same now as it was back in 01
the staff needs to see that and abapt with the change instead of just shooting down ideas of what members of the bord want to see.....
poll the members to see what they would like to see on the bord.......

Marc
 

:drinking: Nice BOOT"S Fudge

As long as he knows we're just teasing him and it's all good natured, then YES :mrgreen: Besides, he set himself up with the cape comment!

January 2006.

Good thread - and I share your sympathies. I had been a regular poster for quite a while and felt that by sharing my experiences I could spare others some of the same pains... for the most part I was right, but the flamers eventually drove me off. Now about the only time I post is when I see somebody being a real *edited*but even that doesn't seem to be a constructive use of my time - so now I just sit back & read for the most part.

:sad: And what may that be. Yea, we just shoot down the ideas. Especially the ones that would make discussions like this even more frequent.

Guess I have been here to long to change. Just an old fart. Guess us old ones had better move aside for new staff, that can make dramatic changes in the board. Oh yea, of course one would need to get that past the owner first. :smile:

Thats pretty harsh. We do have some problems but certainly not the flamers that some boards have or allow. For the most part we shut them down.

Canreef is a good board, with lots of good info and interesting topics. We, as staff, have to try to ride the line between editing or removing threads or not. Gets a little upsetting after awile, being called everything from a censor ******* and various other assorted body parts. :lol:

i dunno, i've been around this board for a few years and haven't really experienced too much anger, or maybe i just ignore it if i see it. guess i'm just lucky:).

This whole thread sounds like some sort suggestion for a get-together and have a group hug.

I embrace the idea...but conceptually impossible. This is why we have Democracy/Communism, Liberal/Conservative, Pro/Anti Homosexuality, and Tangs in a 50g/Tangs in a 100g.

I don't particularly feel abashed that these thread wars are showing up, since opinions are personal and oftentimes very sensitive.

To say that it's become a place for people to "flex their keyboard muscle" is presumptuous. If that was the case, I'd be an ________ for getting angry at someone who flips out at a thread for no reason, and some other regular members would be jerks for pointing out Mik_101 and bv_reefer's spelling flaws with their sarcastic ruthlessness.

That said, moderators can certainly do what they've been posted to do, but you have to treat a forum just like real life:

If you don't like something about human nature, ignore it and chuckle about it with a buddy over a beer.

GG.

Geez, I just edited your thread again, same comments as the other thread. And you guys wonder what my problem is.

You just cant go around posting, calling other members derogatory names. And why pick on those two for spelling. Would you like a reference to all the posts from other members with terrible spelling, not to mention other things.

This is where I'm really surprised. The last one was a good call, I called _____ a fool so good modding; I see where I was wrong and I wouldn't do it again. But you just edited my post again but not for the exact same reason. The supposedly derogatory term I just made wasn't even directed at anyone.

Since everything is so technical, please don't mind if I FAIRLY point out a boo boo that you probably didn't miss while you read through his post:

Once again:

And just in good spirit from now on, I'll PM you if I ever see anything that's unsuitable to be read.

FYI, I made sure that my post just now was void of anything insulting, so I'd be doubly surprised if it were edited yet again.

And no, I have never picked on those two for spelling, nor do I intentionally go around calling people XXXXers and other anatomical parts.

*chews fingernails nervously*

I guess, considering the job that I do every week, any sort of drama on here is pretty low key. And quite frankly, most things aren't remotely important enough to warrant strong feelings on my behalf (except, obviously, a freshwater fish swimming with saltwater fish...he he).

There will be disagreements--obviously. But we can disagree with dignity and respect.

I haven't been on much recently,mostly due to summer and keeping busy with other things,so I haven't noticed much of a problem.Other than a recent incidence in the lounge that was handled fairly quickly.But I think a lot stems from there being so many different ways to have a successful tank,with more than a few of these ways working for some people but not for others.We need to keep that in mind when we read something being suggested,that in our experience didn't work.As an example I think we all for the most part,mix our water a day in advance.But a couple years ago I was at a guys place,who used to be on this board but is no longer with us.He checked his salinity,added salt to a jug or water,shook it up and added it to his tank.My jaw almost hit the floor,but he had a couple very nice healthy tanks.I never said a word,I wouldn't try it,but it works for him.

" Guess I have been here to long to change. Just an old fart. Guess us old ones had better move aside for new staff,"

never said that or implied it, jsut need to be more open about what the members of the bord would like to see. its quit apparent that more then just a few of the members think of you guys *** "censoring********"

Being a mod is a thankless job and I think we all need to remember they are volunteers just trying to help us out and make this board a better environment for learning and the sharing of ideas. Fact is they are human too.
I have said this several times before in threads similar to this but part of the problem is that with the written word "emotions" and "tones" are often very ambiguous and people can take offence where none is meant. Things are often stated very "matter of fact" and when read they generally sound worse than they were intended to be. Now because that is the case we should proof read our responses and confirm that we have actually said what we are trying to say, and yes maybe even catch the odd type-o.
A wise man once said " never attribute to malice what can be attributed to stupiity." Now that doesn't mean people are stupid but that people are often self-absorbed and don't think about how they might impact others with their actions. Most things shouldn't be taken personally.
I think we may all need a little thicker skin and do our best to treat other people the way we would like to be treated. There should never be a need to try and publicly humiliate anyone, if you feel that strongly that something must be said, send a pm and work it out between the two of you. I think the old saying "consider the source" can apply more often than not so a nasty reply is most likely unnecessary.:wink:

pms dont work youll still get banned if ya say the wrong thing

Untrue.

Mods here are much more respectful and mature than other sites, but it's always a problem because sometimes they won't always understand the intentions behind your written word, as Greg finely stated.

This may potentially lead to banning because you don't conform to what their values of mannerisms are. What may be offensive to them may not be to another person.

Moderating is not like the law but their impression makes it out to be.

pm to you sir

explaining myself for above

Then say it in a civilized manner. There is never a need to be rude. When I coached soccer I would tell my players they were not allowed to swear, for one I don't like it but mainly it is a sign of a lazy vocabulary. Swearing is saying what comes easy without having to put any thought into it. I am sure that if a pm was sent that got a point across in a mature manner there would be no reason for a ban. Now that said, I had really hoped that readers of my post would not take the pm statement as the point I was trying to make. (no offence) I guess I must not have explained myself very well.

oh no you were quite clear

im just stateing that with past experiences with ppl i know pms dont work

You did mention his name again with the comment, so I edited it.

The other quote although a bit rude, never mentioned anyone by name and I did comment on it. The reference to some of the pm,s we get, was a general comment regarding moderating threads and not directed at anyone.

So what exactly does this mean then, if its not a direct challenge to the staff for not changing with the times. {whatever that means}.

Thanks